Heart break: The confessions of

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A sister once called me heartless

A cousin half in jest called me heartbreak

So much was it heart felt

.

Shut my eyes tight but instead I locked the thoughts inside

Standing under the shower ‘if only they knew how much I suffered.’

I called it wise and just this judgement I faced

Have you ever heard the sound of a heart break?

It shatters into a million questions

.

These lines always came to me under the shower

It’s the tears shed, I gathered, for when my heart went cold.

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You forget

What mama said?

.

You forget

Mama said don’t run

You might run and fall!

Mama said

You might fall and get hurt

You forget mama said don’t run…

You might fall, In love.

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You forget

.

I’ve been there before!

.

Saying goodbye at the inception

Dying every time of perception

.

I’ve been there before

.

In the rain, in white shoes

With a bouquet of roses;

In spite of myself!!

.

I’ve been there before

.

Calling, writing, Knowing;

“This is pointless!”

.

I’ve been there before…

And vividly I remember how it felt.

.

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So, I kept tripping, but not falling, tripping but not falling

Tripping is not as bad a feeling as falling, is it?

.

For lack of a better word; finally, I fell in love

Mostly with the poetry of her story, I told you

I’ve been there before and other stories

.

A Whitney Houston type of Christ complex I have

Great expectation; so follows it, great disappointment

.

I write better when am alone I create best…

Go away but don’t leave. Don’t leave me to this torture

These, these, these… thoughts, emotions, spirits… – whatever…

No, am not afraid of dying. I just don’t want to be lonely, least not tonight.

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One year is a long time, a lot could happen

What’s colder than a lie in July?

Take for instance a conception in January

So when you see me crying you’ll know she’s gone

Try not to wake me when September ends.

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All I ever wanted was to hurt less;

For others and for myself

Sister dearest, I told them,

“Ask anything of me but my heart”

.

When they did the reverse, Cousin,

Why did I get married? After

I said “I am not boyfriend material”

_______________________________________________________________________________

I am a monster, huh?

I’ll tell u what my Achilles heel is;

Love, I don’t get enough of it!

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